More proof that David Beckham is the world’s most perfect man
Well that National Enquirer once again has the latest breaking news that you and your family need! to! know! Hang your butts off the edges of your seats and read this one!
Is David Beckham A NEAT FREAK?
Speaking of obsessive-compulsive, Posh admits that Soccer God hubby DAVID BECKHAM’s a neat-freak who just loves vacuuming their $22 million, 13,000-square-foot BevHills mansion – and he even (uh-oh!) organizes the food in their refrigerator by color. “David’s very tidy,” Posh told a reporter. “Even our fridge is color-coded. David does the vacuuming. He vacuums in straight lines…then if anyone walks on the carpet, he gets upset, so we have to walk on the other side.”
What the H-E- double hockey sticks prompted anyone to totally fabricate report on this bit of must-have news? This seems pretty mundane for a rag like the Enquirer. I mean, David Beckham vacuums the house? And likes to have things clean and organized? Simply shocking.
Come on National Enquirer. I know you like to report on weird stories and shocking stories and scandalous stories and mostly untrue stories from “sources close to the subject.” But why in God’s green soccer field would you think that anyone would care if David Beckham, god among men, vacuums? Or organizes the refrigerator? Because if anything, this is going to make many women (and not a few men) find him just that much more attractive. I wonder if he puts on his soccer uniform before he gets started and then once the carpet is all vacuumed with the perfect lines or the condiments are alphabetized or the grout in the bathroom is cleaned, he rips off his jersey and runs victory laps around the back yard.
Or maybe he wears the jersey and does all the dishes and the laundry and puts everything away and the gives the dog a bath and the jersey gets all wet a clings to his pectorals. And then he brings you a cold drink and cooks chicken on the grill and makes spinach salad with goat cheese and bacon and then rubs your feet while you watch TV and you get to hold the remote. Yes, National Enquirer you really have shocked the world with this little piece of journalism how just you freaky-deaky The Beck-ham is. To think, we almost didn’t know that!
David Beckham, National Enquirer, Victoria Beckham
November 26th, 2007 at 7:22 pm
[…] 1. David Beckham: The Becks are still going strong, but after David’s injuries, Victoria began to be the moneymaker in the house. Her reunion tour with the rest of the Spice Girls is one of the most popular events in the world, with tickets selling out faster than you can say “Holy shit, Mama Beckham is hot!” In any case, both of the Beckhams are still hot (even if David is a…neat freak?) […]