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Lori’s in a bad mood, Johnny Depp likes pancakes

by Lori

Hello Cherished Readers! Your Trashy Talker Lori is in a bit of a foul mood today due to some stupid and annoying shit that you all don’t want to hear about. (Because in addition to being stupid and annoying it is also boring to anyone else but me.) So in an effort to try and cheer myself up a bit, I went out searching the internet far and wide for the most ridiculous, inane piece of celebrity news I could find. And I didn’t have to go far … a quick hop over to the National Enquirer gave me this gem:

JOHNNY DEPP’S BREAKFAST CLUB

JOHNNY DEPP was decked out in loads of Jack Sparrow-like bracelets and trinkets when he arrived at the Downtown L.A. eatery Pacific Dining Car at one in the morning on July 9.

He and his buddy got a little rowdy over their shared stack of pancakes, but the place was nearly empty – and no one seemed to mind.

I know that the National Enquirer really isn’t known for journalistic integrity or for printing stories that have been verified by, well, anyone. But I have to say that this one has to be true, byt the mere fact that it is completely and totally lame. Who gives a crap that Johnny Depp shared a stack of pancakes with a buddy, except maybe his nutritionist? Not me! Someone on the Enquirer staff showed up with a hangover and sent out a disinterested intern to get a story and that’s what he or she came back with. Johnny Depp eatin’ pancakes and yelling! And they didn’t even get us a picture? We don’t know what sort of syrup he prefers! Does he put butter between all the layers of pancakes or just on the top? Did he order bacon too? Did they cut the stack in half or did Johnny take the top three and his friend took the bottom three? There are a lot of facts missing here! Just like the Enquirer to skip out on all the relevant details.


Posted in Just Plain Dumb, Nobody Cares on August 8th, 2008

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One Response to “Lori’s in a bad mood, Johnny Depp likes pancakes”

  1. peachy Says:
    August 28th, 2008 at 1:14 pm

    And so I guess people are just trying to make some news about Johnny. Oh well.

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Celebrities aren’t perfect. In fact most times they’re drunken douche bags that say, do and perpetuate idiocy. Every so often (or everyday) some take anti-logic to a whole new level and Trashy Celebs is there to document it. Join us Monday through Friday for the realest celebrity gossip we’ve made up and you just might learn something about yourself.

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