Trashy Celebs

Ok, I must admit the new Madonna song 4 Minutes to Save the World is growing on me. And it must be growing on Hannah Montana (aka Miley Cyrus as well). The pint-sized M released a parody (?) of 4 min along with some other tween friend of hers. At least it starts off as a parody with ninjas and them trying to save the world possibly from their grandma’s living room. But then all these professional looking step dancers come out and make it mildly fierce. It looks like something my friend’s and I would have tried to do when we were 13 that is if we were multi-millionaires with an ex-mullet head for a dad. Check it.

Probably by the time this posts the 4 Minutes to Save the World video by Madonna featuring Jason Timberlake will be all over youtube. But we’re tickled pink (as in gay) to see the whole video thanks to Pop Sugar

At first we weren’t too sure about the song. It didn’t have the immediate impact of the entire Confessions on the Dance Floor CD which made us want explode into bunches of fruity gay skittles, but it’s growing on us. That and it has Justin Timberlake dancing so that’s always nice eye candy. Still, it feels so overproduced. It’s not Madonna in her pure freebased form. We do like the Missy Elliott influenced marching band samples but we need more disco to make our Madonna go down smooth.

This past weekend may have been some big Jesus-related holiday where y’all eat sugar and ham but it was also Purim. Yes, Purim the Jewish holiday that commemorates the deliverance of the Jewish people of the ancient Persian Empire from Haman’s plot to annihilate them. But it’s also the Jewish Halloween that’s kind of a crappy Halloween, at least at my old Hebrew school. I won’t go into details but we pretty much just had three options for costumes Haman, the villian, King Ahasuerus, the king or Esther (not Madonna but we’ll get to her), the heroine of the story. So you dress up as one of the Purim people and walk in a big circle making noise and eating Hamantaschen.

What the Guy Richie is a Hamantaschen you ask? Well it’s a delicious triangular cookie with fruit or poppy seed filling that’s shapped like Haman’s hat. I’m not sure what age I noticed they totally look like lady business but Nice Jewish Girls Gone Bad have made a totally weird and funny song about it.

In other Purim sort of related news, Madonna hit the Jewish-rich people Kabbalah fancy dress party all dolled up like Edith Piaf, however hubby Guy Richie dressed down for the event. From the Daily Mail:

Guy Ritchie, 39, opted to dress as cartoon character Asterix - donning a shapeless white tunic, platinum blonde plaits and a Viking helmet with horns.

The annual party to celebrate the Jewish festival of Purim has become a fixture in the Ritchie’s calendar.

But while Madonna makes every effort to wear flattering sexy outfits - last year she wore a 1920s flapper outfit and in 2006 she dressed as a French maid - her husband appears to take the process of dressing up less seriously.

In 2007 he wore a 1970s Village People-style police officer ensemble complete with sunglasses and big moustache to a party at the Kabbalah centre in LA. The year before he wore a costume of Native American Indian dress.

source

Oh girl, that’s doing nothing to squash the rumors Esther and the cop from the Village People are having marital issues. But it is a nice distraction from the mediocrity of 4 Minutes to Save the World. Oh I said it!

Y’all better hop in a plane, like, right now because Madonna is holding auditions for dancers on her new tour starting tomorrow in Los Angeles. Oh, and if you are anything like me, you will be scanning the shelves in the airport bookstore, looking for a book called How to Look Hot and Dance Cool So You Can Go On Tour With Madonna to read on the flight out to L.A.

Having been to one Madonna concert (Reinvention) and watched others on television (Confessions, Drowned World, numerous MTV appearances and videos) I feel I am fully qualified to be a dancer on her new tour, which is presumably to support her upcoming album Hard Candy. Okay, maybe not a dancer. But I could carry stuff and I make good guacamole! There must be a place for me somewhere! Call me, Madonna!

Madonna, Hard Candy

Well there’s not a whole heck of a lot going on in celeb land today. We’re guessing they’re still nursing Oscar hangovers. But while other celebs are laying low, Madonna is always up to something.

On the topics of Oscars, Madage decided to cowboy up when Vanity Fair pussed out of their usual A list party. Madonna hosted a spectacular gathering at her manager Guy Oseary’s Westside Hills home Sunday night that drew Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes, fresh-out-of-rehab Eva Mendes, Owen Wilson, Christian Slater, Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi (who came from Elton John’s fund-raiser), Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher and Cameron Diaz. Damn!

According to Maddonnalicious, “‘There were Le Tourment Vert absinthe fountains flowing all night - it was insane,’ said one partygoer. ‘Diddy grabbed the mike rallying everyone to dance. Elton John and David Furnish were getting down,’ said our source. By midnight, everyone had siphoned off to Prince’s $15 million Beverly Park mansion, where the Klipsch-sponsored bash continued until 6 in the morning.”

Shit, I’d try and become famous just to attend something like that. But me thinks no matter what I do, I won’t ever be cool enough to hang with Madonna and Prince. That’s ok though, I’d be content playing Guitar Hero with Ellen Page and Diablo Cody.

In other Madonna goodness, the goddess will be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame on March 10th, and none other than Justin Timberlake will do the honors. The two collaborated on several songs for Madonna’s forthcoming album called Hard Candy which will drop April 29th. The lead single, 4 Minutes To Save The World featuring JT, will be out at the end of March. Soo there.