So what is up with super hot, cool funky women dating these older dudes. First, last week we heard that former Joan of Arcadia star Amber Tamblyn was dating David Cross (he’s 19 years her senior). And now some pictures popped up of The Big Chill - many other tall-Jew role acting Jeff Goldblum (it’s ok, we’re Jewish therefore can say that, happy Passover) and a mystery woman. We were shocked, appalled and bummed to learn that mystery woman than none other than the anti-Amy Winehouse, Imogen Heap. If you’re unfamiliar with Heap, pull out your copy of the Garden State soundtrack and listen to track #12, Let Go (actually her band Frou Frou). But Imogen has come out with some other amazing CD’s and kicks some major ass in concert. Girl, why you with Goldblum! I just don’t get it.
Over on Page 6 (and wouldn’t THAT count as a tabloid?) ole Joan Collins had some shit to stir about our gossip-driven society. Check out her spiel below:
April 15, 2008 — JOAN Collins says we’re turning into a world of idiots - and she thinks the celebrity magazines are partly to blame. “Our civilization has become extremely dumbed down, with shorter attention spans. All they want are sound bites,” the 75-year-old diva, who famously played super-bitchy Alexis Carrington on “Dynasty,” tells BlackBook’s Steve Garbarino. “The tabloid magazines are the same every week. People has the same cover as InTouch as OK! as Us Weekly as Star magazine. They’re exactly the same! It must be 100 to 120 people you read about all the time.” But why? “They are appealing to a young audience, or a rather dumb audience,” Collins theorizes. She adds that the magazines “go after those girls who exhibit more outrageous behavior. And, believe me, those girls love it. They call in items themselves - that they were at Nobu, some nightclub in SoHo. I can’t think of anything more horrible than that. Publicity can be a drug.”
Tell me something: would Joan Collins still even be barely relevant anymore if it wasn’t for tabloids and gossip columns? I mean, what has she done in the last five, ten years? I had to look it up … she’s done some stunt casting on a few sitcoms, did some theatrical tours with other faded stars (George Hamilton and Stacey Keach), did a show called A Night With Joan Collins detailing the “highs and lows of her roller coaster life” (hmm, sounds a little gossipy to me) and did he show Legends with former co-star Linda Evans (and talked all about how they don’t get along and how she won’t ever work with Evans again — that sounds ULTRA gossipy to me.) Hnmm, Joanie, would you even be popular on the red carpet if it wasn’t for some bitchy behavior in the not to distant past? Let’s face it, Joan Collins is famous for being Joan Collins, just like Paris Hilton is famous for being Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan is famous for being Lindsay Lohan, and Brandon Davis is famous for being Greasy Bear.
And if you wanna talk about trash, then what about those books her sister, Jackie Collins, writes. Lovers and Gamblers? The Bitch? Dangerous Kiss The Hollywood series? I mean, I don’t have anything against trashy novels, but c’mon, Joanie. You know your sister isn’t Eudora Welty.
Remember A Different World that spinoff show from The Cosby Show that was supposedly a vehicle for Lisa Bonet even though she later got knocked up and kicked off the show? “Member?
‘Member?
Well do you remember Whitley, the annoying rich girl who verbally sparred with Denise (Lisa Bonet) and
eventually won the heart of and married Dwayne Wayne, the geek turned cool guy. ‘Member?
Remember how Whitley was played by actress Jasmine Guy, who went on to a successful recording career that I wasn’t even aware of until I was looking for those videos? ‘Member?
Woody Allen sued Dov Charney’s clothing company American Apparel for $10 million for using an image of Allen dressed as a rabbi (scene from Annie Hall) on billboards in New York and Los Angeles. In a Manhattan court, Allen said he does not endorse commercial products or services in the United States, which makes the May 2007 American Apparel billboards and web ads ”especially egregious and damaging.” The lawsuit said Allen was not contacted by the company and did not consent to the use of his image.
Waa, waa Woody Allen. This story is pretty cut and dry boring but Best Week ever put the Soon-Yi in this sue story (sorry had to go there). Check out their fake American Apparel Ads that actually make me want to floss really bad.
Looks like the Today show’s got the right stuff: All five original New Kids on the Block members – Joey McIntyre, Donnie Wahlberg, Danny Wood and brothers Jordan and Jonathan Knight – will appear together in the morning show’s courtyard on April 4, a source tells PEOPLE.
After months of speculation, PEOPLE confirmed in January that the band is reuniting – just in time to celebrate the 20th anniversary of the release of their mega-hit album Hangin’ Tough. The group also recently updated its Web site, nkotb.com.
The boy band, which made legions of tweens swoon in the early ’90s, selling more than 50 million albums, became a worldwide phenomenon before calling it quits in 1994. Since then, the oldest “Kid,” Jonathan Knight, 39, retreated back to Boston to become a real estate developer. Former members Wahlberg, 38, and McIntyre, 35, have seen acting success, while Wood, 38, has worked as a music producer and Jordan Knight, 37, has continued to record.
Lori: Hey, the New Kids on the Block are reuniting!
Amy: Oh good lord.
And that’s all the really needs to be said about that one, except of course, I will say more. And I will start with a question? Whose brilliant idea was this one? I mean, come on! The world does not need a freaking New Kids on the Block reunion tour. In fact, we already had that, back when boy bands like N’Sync and Backstreet Boys got popular — it was essentially a reunion, right? I mean pretty boys who sang in harmony and danced. It’s all the same, and even Justin “I hang with Timbaland” Timberlake likes to pretend it never happened.
I will admit, I also don’t like to think about this because I don’t like to think about the NKOTB album Hangin’ Tough being 20 years old because that just reminds me how old I am. But really, what is sadder than watching a bunch of aging pretty boys pushing 40 and trying to dance like they are still in their teens? Do we really want to see a bunch of guys who should be on the golf course or taking their kids to soccer practice doing this?
And another thing: when the New Kids were first popular, they were 15, 16, 18 or so and their audience was 12 to 14 year old girls (and I’m sure, boys). Granted, I listened to them in college, but I probably did so ironically. Anyway, who is the audience this time around? It can’t see today’s 12-14 year old girls because 1) they won’t care and 2) that is just creepy? This there really enough nostalgia amongst today’s thirtysomethings to sustain a Ne Kids Reunion? Personally, I don’t think so. No matter what, Trashy Celebs will be following this story with great interest, and maybe even getting out our old mix tapes with New Kids songs, so listen to secretly in the car.
Hot Tranny 16th pres Abraham Lincoln got a fierce makeover for his face place on the five dollar bill. The US Treasury gave Abe a little pick-me-up by adding some purple to the bill (but it’s actually more of a magenta). To the naked eye, the most notable difference is color — splashes of light purple at the center of the bill that blend into gray near the edges. The new note also will feature an enlarged “5″ printed in high-contrast purple ink in the lower right corner of the back of the bill.
The bill, which went into circulation yesterday also features a bit of purple around the rail splitter’s cheeks and brow area. “She looks fierce!” proclaimed recent 20 dollar bill makeoveree Andrew Jackson. “I’m totally going for a hot-fushia for my next redesign, whenever those tranny bitches at the U.S. mint get off their Ice Queen asses and order me up some big numbers and more color.”
“Bitch please,” chimed in Thomas Jefferson, the face of the two-dollar bill. “I’ve been wearing this same stale look since 1976. I’m lucky I’m not hosting a Declaration of Independence fondue party while wearing a Nehru jacket.”
“Wait, wait, wait. It is all about the Benjamins,” said 100 dollar bill face Ben Franklin. “I needs to be big PIMPin’ since I’m the mother F’in focus of so many hip-hop songs. And while you’re at it can I get a couple of ho’s up in here? Key party, you know what I’m saying baybee.”
That day we all thought would never, ever, ever come has actually arrived: Star Jones and Al Reynolds have split up. Can you believe it? Aren’t you just stunned? I haven’t been this shocked since Liza divorced David Gest.
Star Jones tells husband Al Reynolds it’s over
Star Jones has had it with hubby Al Reynolds after just three years. “She told Al at the end of January that he had 30 days to get his act together or ‘get out,’” a source told the National Enquirer.
Nearly three and half years after they swapped “I dos” at their corporate-sponsored wedding, Star Jones and Al Reynolds are calling it quits. The National Enquirer reports the legal diva sent Al his walking papers a month ago.
A rep for Jones says the report is false, but the Enquirer goes on to say, “They hadn’t been seeing eye to eye for months and had already spent a great deal of time apart,” a friend of the couple told the Enquirer. “Finally, Star decided it was over. She told Al at the end of January that he had 30 days to get his act together or ‘get out.’”
The pair made one last public appearance at the Feb. 1 Baby Phat fashion show in New York City, but everything fell apart days later. That prompted Star to show Al the door ahead of schedule, the source said. “Al moved some of his things out of their Upper East Side apartment and returned to Miami, where he’d already been spending a lot of time recently.”
The Enquirer spoke to another insider who confirmed the breakup and revealed Star’s intention to make it permanent. “Star is planning to divorce Al.” As for reason behind the split, the source added, “I think Star felt Al had spent their marriage riding her success while she did all the heavy lifting. She resented it. Deep down, Star is a very old-fashioned woman who believes a man should support her emotionally, physically and financially. She now believes Al failed her.”
Can you believe that shit? Perhaps Star Jones had unrealistic expectations? I mean, she wanted Al to support her “emotionally, physically and financially?” Is she not the more successful (career-wise) of the two? She was a laywer, she was on The View, she had her own show on Court TV? Of course, the wedding was corporate-sponsored, so perhaps things weren’t going as well as she led us all to believe. (Hey, do you think part of the corporate sponsorship agreement required them to stay together at least three years? I wonder if there is a no-compete clause.)
Well, we all know that Star Jones’ problem is that she not only believes that her husband should support her “emotionally, physically, and financially,” but she believes he should also NOT BE FREAKING GAY. C’mon Star Jones. Give Liza Minelli a call and talk this one through.
So sometimes you wake up on a Sunday morning thinking “what the Haley Joel Osment did I do last night?” There’s regrets and embarrassments followed by an afternoon spent cradling a cheese steak while watching a Road Rules/Real World marathon on MTV. But why wait until Sunday when celebs are preforming regrettable acts possibly sober. Here’s a couple of stories from late this week that equally gave us the willies. Decide for yourself which is more cringe-worthy.
Cynthia Nixon blows big love chunks all over our Cynthia Nixon lesbo fantasy
Cynthia Nixon opened up about her four-year relationship with not so hot Christine Marinoni, a New York state education activist to reporters this week. “I’m in a fantastic relationship,” said Miranda, er, Cynthia “We shop and cook and raise children…We both pitch in.” Much like in Sex and the City but with a chick, Cynthia and her partner raise her two kids, Samantha, 11, and Charles, 6, in Brooklyn.
“I’m in love with her because she’s her. If she were a man, would I be in love with her? I don’t know.”
Now, Lori and I are two gay homosexual lesbians and we’re happy that Cynthia Nixon has found true love but ew. U-G-L-Y she ain’t got no alibi she ugly!
Louis Vuitton cures Keith Richardson’s hide for a new line of bags
At least that’s the only reason we can imagine Richards would be chosen as the new face of Louis Vuitton. For his first ever ad campaign, the 64-year-old Richards, who has a rocky history of drug use and recently snorted his dad’s ashes, is seen cradling his guitar on a hotel-room bed, the lights part obscured by skull-print black drapes.
Despite the overall weirdness of this at least it’s for a good cause. Richards plans to donate the fee for the ad to the Climate Project, launched by Al Gore and backed by Louis Vuitton.
So which story freaks your freak more? C’mone all two of you, let us know.
Hillary Clinton continued her comedy circuit tour by appearing on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart Monday night. Clinton, who also popped up on Saturday Night Live was still full of hope and viggor.
I unfortunately was not after spending the night glued to CNN and their campaign number-crunching Lookey-Loo. Earlier in the evening Wolf Blitzer and his looky-loo running bitch, John King were raising questions about if the Democratic party should ask Clinton to stop running. Noooo!
We’ve been supporters of Hil since she announced her nomination and are encouraged that SNL skits can help her campaign. Sure Obama has the hip college crowd and Rudi Guiliani’s 17 year-old daughter supporting him but Clinton has a desperate housewife. Eva Longoria who recently came out in support of Hill accompanied her at her “Texas-Sized” Town Hall meeting in Austin on Monday night.
Speaking of Texas, this is going to be a long night because it’s already 10:15 on the east coast and only 15% of precincts have reported, not to mention the fakakta caucuses they have there. Oy! If you’re such a great state get your shit together and learn how to organize a vote. Come on, you owe us for producing George Bush.
UPDATE: Yaaay! Thanks Texas! Not since Ann Richards have we agreed on something. On to Pennsylvania.
While searching amongst yesterday’s slim pickin’s of celebrity news, I happened upon this picture of my Great Aunt Bea in Paris. Aunt Bea was front and center along with Victoria Beckham at Italian designer Giambattista Valli’s show previewing his 08 Fall-Winter collection.
I was surprised as anyone to see this and was even more surprised when I called my mom and she told me Great Aunt Bea was in fact not in Paris but at her Thursday yiddish class at the Pikesville Senior Center. Upon hearing that I instantly realized my mistake and this picture isn’t of Great Aunt Bea but of Mary-Kate Olsen looking like a major fuck-tard. My bad.
Jane Fonda went on the Today show dropping bigger bombs than Monster In-Law. Uh-Huh I said it. While making an appearance with Eve Ensler to promote the 10th anniversary of Ensler’s play the Vagina Monologues, the 70-year old let her potty mouth fly.
This all went down as Fonda was relaying a lovely story about how she was asked to perform a monologue with a slang term for vagina as the title — and then she said a word that I’d like to pretend older ladies like my grandma had never ever heard before. Grandma, if you’re reading this she said Helen Hunt. Don’t question why that’s bad, it just is.
If you’re not my grandma, take a look at Fonda in action and then Meredith Vieira apologizing to god-fearing people for offending them and the baby Jesus.
We think this is rather hilarious but others weren’t giggling. “There is no excuse for airing one of the most patently offensive words in the English language on broadcast television, especially at the breakfast hour,” Parent Television Council (PTC) president Tim Winter, a former NBC employee, said in a statement Thursday.
All this comes on the tails of Diane Keaton saying “Fuck” on ABC’s Good Morning America (does menopause make you curse like a sailor?) Shit, maybe I need to start watching the networks in the morning instead of Robin and Company on Headline News. Dr. Sanjay Gupta never gets racier than talking about a colon problem.
But we really think America is wound a little too tight. While flipping channels if I can accidentally see someone with a nail through their head on TLC or Ann Coulter’s face anywhere, then I think it’s ok if I hear “Cunt” before nine A.M. Whoops, sorry Grandma, I meant to say that pig in Babe was a Runt. Happy Belated Valentine’s Day!
So the Trash Talkers have not yet had the chance to watch this years Grammy broadcast (safely stored in the DVR for now) because we had tickets last night to see the Queen of Trash Talk, Kathy Griffin.
The show was fabulous, and not only did we laugh our trash talkin’ asses off, we also got to see a couple of drunk girls tossed out of the show for trying to out trash talk Kathy F’n Griffin. Nice try stupid drunk girls. Also, the pre-show warm up music featured songs by Clay Aiken, Paul Abdul, and Britney Spears, so we knew exactly who she was probably going to talk about during her show. (And she did not let us down, comparing a certain over exposed part of Britney Spears’ anatomy with a chow tongue. Yes, she went there.) In fact, it is now my dream to someday have Kathy Griffin guest write a post for this blog. I’m not delusional, I know it will never happen, but even a Trash Talkin’ girl has dreams!
But I have to say, I wonder if even Kathy Griffin would go here:
I mean, oh my! Oh my! What happened to Aretha Franklin? What happened? Why doesn’t anybody do anything? Because, frankly, I am worried about her. She is freaking brilliant, she has a voice like nobody’s business and she can sing anything. I still remember when she performed “Nessun Dorma” at the 1998 Grammy Awards show; it totally gave me chills.
And now I am afraid all I can see is an unhealthy Aretha wearing a very ill-advised bright yellow dress with spaghetti straps. I mean, look at the picture. I’m afraid Cyndi Lauper is going to fall face first into Aretha’s chest and not be found for days. Days, people! Even with that warning flare of a hairstyle! I feel really bad even saying anything at all about it …. like I am going to end up in R&B Hell listening to Peabo Bryson or Jodeci forever. So, okay, I am not making fun of Aretha Franklin. I won’t do it. But I am worried about her … and I do think she should fire her damn stylist.
The fine folks over at dlisted posted this picture that is going to give me nightmares forever and ever (Sweatin’ to the Brain Burn) so I had to rush right over here and share it with all of you. If I was a better, nicer person, I would put this behind a cut, but since I am not, and because if I have to know this, then you have to know this, it’s goin’ right here, front and center. Don’t say I didn’t warn you bitches.
Hot damn, people. If that isn’t sexy, then neither is Justin Timberlake. But seriously, did Simmons really have to do that? I mean, good for him for being in good shape and for being able to wear those little shorts and for having shaved his inner thighs. But now I am in the position of having to think about Richard Simmon’s underpants, and that is something I could have gone my whole entire life without thinking about. Because if I have to think about his underpants then I can’t help but think about how he has balls in that underwear and I REALLY don’t want to think about Richard Simmon’s balls, do you? (That is totally going to be the name of the next girl punk band I form: Richard Simmon’s Balls.) Before today, I was only afraid of Richard Simmon’s big old white-man ‘fro, which he’s been sportin’ for as long as I remember. Now I’m not only scared of the ‘fro, but I have a vague mental image of his nutsack, and seriously, there is just not enough gin in the world to erase that.
Aw, look at the happy parents-to-be! I guess things work different in Australia, all the way over there on the other side of the world and the whole who carries the kangaroo in the pouch works differently, because judging from that picture, Keith Urban is well on his way to craving crunchy salty foods one minute then sending Nicole out for frozen yogurt the next. Or maybe it’s all about french fries or pizza or something with melted cheese. Or chocolate. Who knows what sort of food cravings a pregnant Australian country-singer might have?
This baby will be the first for Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban. Kidman has two children with former husband Tom “Crazypants” Cruise. Hopefully this pregnancy will make Kidman actually smile enough to prove that she has teeth.
Y’all, Gary Coleman is selling clothes from the Gap. No, I don’t mean he is their new spokesperson or in any of those commercials where people dance around. And he’s not posing in ads in magazines or on billboards. No, no, I don’t mean that he is actually working at the Gap selling t-shirts and fleeces and sweaters and khakis. What I mean is that Gary Coleman, former child star, is selling his own Gap khakis on ebay for fun and profit.
Well I’m sure it’s for profit but judging from that picture, I don’t think Coleman is having that much fun. He looks like he’s being photographed before being sent off to his cell in a minimum security prison. Or maybe a photo for his ID at his new job as a cook in a community college cafeteria. Sheesh, Gary, I’m sure selling your pants (or at least a pair of pants that you wore for 30 seconds while this picture was taken) is humiliating, but if you want people to bid, you gotta smile a little and at least act like you are having fun. Maybe through in a “Whatchoo biddin’ on, Willis?” for good measure.
Here’s the text of the ebay ad, which you can see in full (or make your bid) here.
Here are a pair of Gap Athletic Pants that Gary Coleman wore. He signed the back pocket. The material is 100% Polyester. The color is Khaki, with blue, green, and white stripes down the Sides. The pants are from Gap Kids the Size is XL 12 Regular. This pair would be perfect for any child who loves gary or for anyone who loves his memorabilia. Here is a great gift to have. I also have more memorabilia so please check into my Site often. Thanks for Visiting and good Luck to all who bid thanks!!!
Yeah, that “Pants that Gary Coleman wore” really makes me think that these pants aren’t actually Gary Coleman’s, but are some pants belonging to the son of Coleman’s dealer or something, and Gary owes him some money and doesn’t have any cash, so the dealer made him wear and autograph his son’s pants so he could sell them. And who loses here? Not Coleman, who should have a little more dignity, and not the weirdos who are bidding on this crap (seriously, what is anyone going to do with a pair of pants signed by Gary Coleman.) The real loser here is that kid who had to give up his pants because his dad (or mom or uncle or cousin) is Gary Coleman’s dealer and wants his money.
Celebrities aren’t perfect. In fact most times they’re drunken douche bags that say, do and perpetuate idiocy. Every so often (or everyday) some take anti-logic to a whole new level and Trashy Celebs is there to document it. Join us Monday through Friday for the realest celebrity gossip we’ve made up and you just might learn something about yourself.
Tom Cruise to be President Of US Tom Cruise is going to be the President of the United States, but no not for real. Tom Cruise was rumored a while back to be running for presidency but it seems it was all for a movies.
I [...]
Smartwater revisited
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Tons More Photos of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt at Cannes! Wow. Just wow. Angelina and Brad both look amazing at Cannes. This first set of photos of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt is at the Kung Fu Panda afterparty. I must say, I absolutely admire Angie right [...]
Big Box of Gay Marriage Yesterday The California Supreme Court took a stance for equality and what's right by overturning the archaic ban on gay marriage. Yes we called it archaic, we're talking to you Missouri! The judges [...]
Shania Twain Separating After 14 Years Of Marriage
Singer Shania Twain, 42, and her longtime husband, Robert "Mutt" Lange, 52, are separating.
The couple has been married for fourteen years. They met after Lange saw Twain in one of her [...]
Angelina Jolie At Kung Fu Panda Photocall
I know I'm doing this backwards but I finally got a chance to sit down and post pictures from the Kung Fu Panda photocall from earlier today. When asked if the feel good movie about a [...]
Tom Cruise's Asbestos Scare Remember a while back when Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes went to a party aboard the Scientologist cruise ship? Apparently everyone on board may need to be seen by a doctor due to an asbestos scare. [...]
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt Arrive at Cannes
Angelina and Brad have arrived at the 2008 Cannes Film festival for the premier of Kung Fu Panda at the Palais des Festivals. Angie is wearing stunning green dress by Max Azria. Her shoes are [...]
Video:Angelina Jolie On Today, Babies Due August 19th It looks like Angelina's Kung Fu Panda co-starts can't keep their mouths. In addition to yesterday's twins guffaw by Jack Black, Dustin Hoffman revealed Angelina's due date in a separate [...]
Hot Off The Press
Recap delay....
Hi folks, I'm having a bit of an internet problem (what timing! :P). But once this is fixed, I'm going to get right down to last night's episode. Mmmkay? [...]
Does Co-Sleeping Cause Sleepless Nights? Over at Babble there was an interesting article on sleeping, specifically co-sleeping. The general idea is that co-sleeping leads to sleep problems in children. Apparently ignoring all the child who [...]
Frugal Friday - Week In Review In an effort to share the most frugal information possible in the shortest amount of time (yeah, I'm frugal with that too!), Fridays will henceforth be known as Frugal Fridays, and they will feature [...]
Who sets the example for your children? This is probably going to be a pretty random blog today... kind of my rant against the world. Hang in there with me!
Non-believers, and those who would love to portray Christians in a negative [...]
Tons More Photos of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt at Cannes! Wow. Just wow. Angelina and Brad both look amazing at Cannes. This first set of photos of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt is at the Kung Fu Panda afterparty. I must say, I absolutely admire Angie right [...]
My Dog Turned Green I mean that literally. We had Agility training tonight and I decided that Kodiak and Quinn deserved to come along. There are several fields fenced off and they usually move the sheep so the dogs can [...]
When the World gets so STRESSED: Find an alibi
New Photo by Mary MacIntyre
What a day, and a long one! I took a break and had lunch with a friend at Tecolote on Cerrillos. It hit the spot. Perfect for a cold rainy day. Day 2 of rain a [...]
Bonnets for Breastfeeding
Since I am still new to breastfeeding, sometimes I find it a little difficult. Especially when I am out in public. Where do I breastfeed that is safe, and private? How do I nurse without my [...]
Tristi Pinkston's Season of Sacrifice ~ Author Interview Hello and welcome to Fiction Scribe, Ms. Pinkston.
Let's start with getting to know you a little better. List five things you feel define you as a person.
Naps
Movies
Books
Spending insane [...]
There is a new autho on the Life as a Christian Woman website. Linda Williams writes about being a woman of faith, and living the Christian Life. I would encourage you to read her post "Who [...]
