Trashy Celebs

Carrie Underwood & Chace Crawford Split

Carrie Underwood and Chace Crawford have split, sources confirm to Usmagazine.com.

The American Idol winner, 25, and the Gossip Girl star, 22, had been dating since last July, but did not go public with their romance until October.

Underwood had spent Thanksgiving at his parents’ home in Dallas and part of her Christmas break with his relatives.

An insider told Us Weekly in December, “His parents are fond of her… they believe ‘Carrie Crawford’ would be a great addition to the family!”

“She’s a classy girl,” Crawford told Us in October.

Rumors linking Crawford to buddy JC Chasez sparked Chasez to tell Kiss-FM 104.7 Wednesday, “For the record, we’re both straight. We’re not dating.”

Underwood’s rep was not available for comment; Crawford’s declined to comment.

Wow, Carrie Underwood finds herself single again. I wonder what happened this time. Maybe we will get a country western song about it, ala “Before He Cheats”? Except I don’t even know if Carrie Underwood wrote that, so maybe I shouldn’t be looking to her next album for clarification. But I have to say, I thought that Underwood could do better than the failed Dallas Cowboy quarterback Tony Romo and I certainly think she can do better than some pretty boy on a TV show no one has ever heard of. And if Chace Crawford feels the need to go on the radio and announce and he is not gay and that he is not dating JC Chasez, then I have to think he probably is and that they probably are.

Carrie Underwood, Chace Crawford, JC Chasez, Tony Romo

George Michael is planning a U.S. Tour! A tour! Finally! A tour of the U.S.!

George Michael plans first U.S. tour in 17 years

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - George Michael has a lot of “Faith” in his North American fans. The British pop singer on Monday unveiled plans for his first tour of the United States and Canada in 17 years, beginning June 17 at San Diego Sports Arena.

The 22-date arena trek runs through August 3 at the BankAtlantic Center in Fort Lauderdale, Fla.

Tickets for the “25 Live” tour go on sale to the general public on April 6th, a week after fan club members get first dibs. Ticketmaster currently lists one show, the July 7 gig at Saint Paul, MN., where the top price is $175.

While his international appeal remains strong, Michael’s profile in the United States has waned over the past decade, although his last album, 2004’s “Patience,” managed to peak at No. 12 thanks to an appearance on “The Oprah Winfrey Show.”

Michael, 44, rose to fame in the early 1980s as one-half of the singing duo Wham! and enhanced his popularity with his solo debut, 1987’s “Faith,” which has been certified for U.S. shipments in excess of 10 million copies. It included the hit singles “Father Figure,” “I Want Your Sex Parts 1 & 2″ and the title track.

Subsequent efforts did not sell nearly as well, and Michael’s career ground to a halt in the early 1990s when he unsuccessfully sued Sony to get out of his contract. In 1998, he was arrested for lewd conduct in Beverly Hills, and subsequently disclosed his homosexuality.

The European leg of his “25 Live” tour took him to 12 countries where he performed 80 shows for some 1.3 million fans, according to a statement.

The North American tour will promote a double-disc hits set, the second of his career. “Twenty-Five” is scheduled for U.S. release on April 1, a decade after Michael issued the retrospective “Ladies & Gentlemen: The Best of George Michael.”

I was excited to hear about this tour, because I have been a fan of George Michael’s ever since way back in the day when my local small town radio station would break in during American Top 40 with Casey Kasem to play “I Want Your Love” in place of the evil, immoral “I Want Your Sex.” I probably danced to “Father Figure” at my prom, sang along to “Faith” as I drove around in my car, and pretended that “Monkey” was somehow relevant to my life. And when I was an older and wiser college girl, I listened to “Freedom 90″ and pretended it was also relevant to my life (and I still do that today, as it’s my favorite George Michael song.) So now, as a wiser woman in her 30s, I finally have the resources to buy tickets and go shake my ass along with all the other gays. BUT GEORGE MICHAEL IS NOT COMING TO MY MIDWESTERN CITY.

George, why do you break my heart so? I stuck by you through the scandals, the coming out, the bathroom solicitation, the park hookups with random British men. Why can’t you come to my Midwestern city? I promise you, we have many public parks and rest rooms to choose from.

That day we all thought would never, ever, ever come has actually arrived: Star Jones and Al Reynolds have split up. Can you believe it? Aren’t you just stunned? I haven’t been this shocked since Liza divorced David Gest.

Star Jones tells husband Al Reynolds it’s over

Star Jones has had it with hubby Al Reynolds after just three years. “She told Al at the end of January that he had 30 days to get his act together or ‘get out,’” a source told the National Enquirer.

Nearly three and half years after they swapped “I dos” at their corporate-sponsored wedding, Star Jones and Al Reynolds are calling it quits. The National Enquirer reports the legal diva sent Al his walking papers a month ago.

A rep for Jones says the report is false, but the Enquirer goes on to say, “They hadn’t been seeing eye to eye for months and had already spent a great deal of time apart,” a friend of the couple told the Enquirer. “Finally, Star decided it was over. She told Al at the end of January that he had 30 days to get his act together or ‘get out.’”

The pair made one last public appearance at the Feb. 1 Baby Phat fashion show in New York City, but everything fell apart days later. That prompted Star to show Al the door ahead of schedule, the source said. “Al moved some of his things out of their Upper East Side apartment and returned to Miami, where he’d already been spending a lot of time recently.”

The Enquirer spoke to another insider who confirmed the breakup and revealed Star’s intention to make it permanent. “Star is planning to divorce Al.” As for reason behind the split, the source added, “I think Star felt Al had spent their marriage riding her success while she did all the heavy lifting. She resented it. Deep down, Star is a very old-fashioned woman who believes a man should support her emotionally, physically and financially. She now believes Al failed her.”

Can you believe that shit? Perhaps Star Jones had unrealistic expectations? I mean, she wanted Al to support her “emotionally, physically and financially?” Is she not the more successful (career-wise) of the two? She was a laywer, she was on The View, she had her own show on Court TV? Of course, the wedding was corporate-sponsored, so perhaps things weren’t going as well as she led us all to believe. (Hey, do you think part of the corporate sponsorship agreement required them to stay together at least three years? I wonder if there is a no-compete clause.)

Well, we all know that Star Jones’ problem is that she not only believes that her husband should support her “emotionally, physically, and financially,” but she believes he should also NOT BE FREAKING GAY. C’mon Star Jones. Give Liza Minelli a call and talk this one through.

Star Jones, Liza Minelli, Al Reynolds

Spencer Pratt (and I will admit I still am not 100 percent sure who he is or why I should care) is apparently planning on or seriously considering or pricing doctors or trying to get pre-approval from his HMO for a very special treatment plan. A delicate condition, requiring specialists, quiet consideration, and sensitivity. Yes, Spencer Pratt is getting calf implants.

Heidi Montag’s, lover Spencer Pratt, plans to get calf implants to look more buff, Star reports.

“Spencer works out with a trainer almost daily, but he can’t get rid of his skinny legs, and it drives him nuts. Heidi even nicknamed him Chicken Legs!” a pal tells Star. “Spencer is secretly insecure about his legs.”

But he still hasn’t gone through with the surgery. “He knows it’s a painful procedure.”

I know I really shouldn’t be surprised by the variety of cosmetic procedures available today. I know it is more than just eye lifts or liposuction or breast implants. But calf implants? I just don’t understand. That’s like having your elbows enlarged or your big little toe made littler. I mean sure, we’ve all perhaps admired a nice pair of calves on a runner in the park or a bicycler on TV. But to think that they are so important that calf implants are a necessity? I don’t get that. It’s not like having reconstructive surgery after an accident or something. It’s just a weird sort of leg vanity.

This whole story just makes me think of this episode of MTV’s True Life I saw a couple of times. (Because anyone who has ever seen this show knows that the can be watched more than once, and if you are ever at home sick or wake up on the weekend with a hangover, spending the day on the couch with some diet Coke and a marathon of True Life is pretty much perfect.) The episode was “I Want the Perfect Body” and there was a young man featured, about Spencer Pratt’s age, who wanted calf implants. He worked out a lot and just “couldn’t get his calves the way he wanted them.” His friends and family seemed to think he was ridiculous for the amount of money he was spending. But he went ahead with it and spent the weekend alone in a hotel room recovering. Later they showed him getting ready to go out dancing at a club and he was wearing glitter on his chest. Then later I was reading about the show on an internet forum and heard this guy was now doing gay porn.

So what have we learned? Calf implants are stupid and lead to wearing glitter which is also stupid which leads to doing gay porn witch may or may not be stupid, depending on how much you are getting paid. It remains to be seen if Spencer Pratt is going to follow this same pattern.

Spencer Pratt, True Life, calf implants

Things are a little (olay a lot) busy in the Trash Talkin’ household today, but I didn’t want to leave you without any trash to talk yourselves, so here are some blind items I spotted over on Gawker. Some of them are pretty obvious, some of them are a little hard to figure out and all of them are fun (and sometimes gross.) Enjoy.

* What couple almost split up during the making of that movie because she was on fire with jealousy that he got to show his actual talent? (No worries. It totally bombed.)
* Which top anchor is a bottom?
* Which pop star is a top? (Or so goes the legend; actually, he and one of his hot boyfriends switched positions and loved it.)
* Which female politician once slept with a rabbi’s sister, according to an American Idol personality who’s a friend of the rabbi?
* What much younger songstress has very little actual chemistry with the husband, probably because she’s a big old lesbo?
* Which pasty-white club mess (with his friends) blithely walked out on a check at Beige (after insanely trying to get me to pay it) and was thrown out of Hiro for choking his boyfriend, the same week he was featured in New York magazine’s Look Book? What same guy became the subject of restraining tactics by a stylist when he kept using the stylist’s name to get free clothes long after he ceased working for him? (Oh, did I mention he’s also a thief?)
* What cute, young guy, who’s Hollywood royalty, recently had a heartwarming experience peeing into a trannie’s anus, only to have all kinds of shit shoot out?
* Which exotic, young hotshot designer has been supposedly doing it with that black rapper with many children?

blind items

The fine folks over at dlisted posted this picture that is going to give me nightmares forever and ever (Sweatin’ to the Brain Burn) so I had to rush right over here and share it with all of you. If I was a better, nicer person, I would put this behind a cut, but since I am not, and because if I have to know this, then you have to know this, it’s goin’ right here, front and center. Don’t say I didn’t warn you bitches.

Hot damn, people. If that isn’t sexy, then neither is Justin Timberlake. But seriously, did Simmons really have to do that? I mean, good for him for being in good shape and for being able to wear those little shorts and for having shaved his inner thighs. But now I am in the position of having to think about Richard Simmon’s underpants, and that is something I could have gone my whole entire life without thinking about. Because if I have to think about his underpants then I can’t help but think about how he has balls in that underwear and I REALLY don’t want to think about Richard Simmon’s balls, do you? (That is totally going to be the name of the next girl punk band I form: Richard Simmon’s Balls.) Before today, I was only afraid of Richard Simmon’s big old white-man ‘fro, which he’s been sportin’ for as long as I remember. Now I’m not only scared of the ‘fro, but I have a vague mental image of his nutsack, and seriously, there is just not enough gin in the world to erase that.

Oh boy, I hope my mom isn’t reading this.

Richard Simmons, manties, Richard Simmons’ balls

This week, Jodie Foster was honored at the Sixteenth Annual Women in Entertainment Breakfast with the Sherry Lansing Leadership Award. Jodie Foster receiving an award? That’s not really new. She’s been in show business for 42 of her 45 years, so of course she’s received plenty of awards by now. But what is surprising was a portion of her acceptance speech:

Toward the end of her remarks, Jodie thanked those nearest and dearest to her. Among them was “my beautiful Cydney who sticks with me through all the rotten and the bliss.”

What a lovely thing to say! And it acknowledges what has been in the tabloids and on the internets for years. Foster has apparently been in a relationship with Cydney Bernard for more than ten years and the pair are raising two children together. (Both children have the middle name “Bernard,” further proof of Foster and Bernard’s relationship and status as a family.)

Many in the gay community have been waiting for years for Foster to come out, to ad her voice to those demanding tolerance, demanding rights, demanding recognition of our relationships and of our families. Many might see this as Foster’s “first step” toward coming out and speaking out. But I have a feeling that this is Foster’s first and only step …. not because she is still in the closet and plans to stay, but because she’s been doing what we all want … living her life and building her family and raising her children. I have said before that I think celebrities should come out in this way — just sort of casually, matter-of-factly, without fanfare or announcements or “spin.” When you don’t act like something is “wrong” then generally, no one else will either. As it should be.

Jodie Foster, Cydney Bernard, gay celebrities, coming out

Oh noes! Could it be? No, it can’t be? But could it be true? Are lesbian icon Ellen DeGeneres and her much younger girlfriend, Portia de Rossi packing up hers and hers U-Hauls and calling it quits? Or rather, has Portia decided that the royalties from the sale of Arrested Development DVDs are enough to sustain the Sapphic lifestyle to which she has become accustomed?

From Star magazine:

According to multiple sources, [Ellen’s] really in pain because her three-year romance with actress Portia de Rossi is all but over.

“Ellen would never have broken down like that on TV if things were right in her home life,” one source tells Star.

Portia has been telling Ellen she’s very unhappy at home,” says a second source….”When it comes down to it, she wants to be with someone younger and hotter. She wants out, but Ellen has been begging her to stay. Portia is really everything in this world to her.”

So according to ironclad source Star magazine, the reason for this:

is not because Ellen was upset about a dog getting taken away from two little girls but because a cute little pussy might be taken away from her.

Lori: AW MAN! Did I really just write that? I can’t believe I did that! My mom reads this site!
Amy: I’m going to tell your mom you said pussy on the internet.

I must say, that while I am a fan of Ellen’s and while I do admire her and her show and all she has done for gay visibility and the like, I have never quite forgiven her for dumping partner Alexandra Hedison (who was there to pick up the pieces after the Anne Heche fiasco) for the younger and blonder de Rossi. Karma’s a big queeny bitch, isn’t it, Ellen?

For more on who’s hooking up and who’s breaking up, check out Superstar Couples!

Ellen DeGeneres, Portia de Rossi, Alexandra Hedison, Anne Heche, Iggy

What well known singer who is currently starring in a movie about marriage has no plans to wed off-screen? The singer says that she would like to have kids one day but won’t admit that the reason she hasn’t walked down the aisle with her longtime boyfriend is — she’s gay!
source: Star Magazine, 10/29/2007

Well let’s break this down a bit. What movie is currently out about marriage? A quick trip to the Internet Movie Database tells us that Why Did I Get Married? is currently number two at the box office (after 30 Days of Night which I don’t think has anything to do with marriage. So there, we have our movie.

Now who is in this movie? What actress is in this movie who is also a “well-known singer”? IMDB helps us out there too. There is Janet Jackson and there is Jill Scott. Janet Jackson is obviously a well-known singer. But how well-known is Jill Scott? Hmm. Well obviously Jackson is more well-known than Scott, so it doesn’t really matter how “well-known” Scott is — in this case, it’s gotta be Jackson.

So, after that little bit of analysis we have this: HOLY SHIT JANET JACKSON IS A GAY HOMOSEXUAL!

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In a Shameless ploy to keep up with the Joneses, the Joneses being the FOX network, ABC is sending former Lost star Michelle Rodriguez to jail. Not to be outdone by FOX’s 24 star Kiefer Sutherland’s spankin’ new jail time, Rodriguez has selflessly agreed to do time for the cause. The “straight” actress was sentenced Wednesday to at least 120 days in jail for violating probation in a DUI case.

“(She) admitted violating her probation by failing to provide proof of completion of her community service and for consuming alcohol three times while wearing an alcohol-monitoring device,” said the L.A. City Attorney’s office in a statement.

But we know the Girl Fight star was just taking one for the team to get on the good graces of ABC execs. She’s doing this knowing that this time won’t be a slap on the wrist neither. Superior Court Judge Daviann L. Mitchell ruled that the actress is not to be granted an early release, despite L.A.’s jail overcrowding. She was also ordered to complete 30 days of road clean-up duty.

If you recall, in May 2006, she served only four hours and 20 minutes of a two-month sentence at the Lynwood, Calif., jail for violating probation, stemming from a DUI arrest in Hawaii in December 2005.

The City Attorney’s office had alleged that Rodriguez turned in a false document showing that she completed one day of service on Sept. 25, court filings show. The actress later stated that she was in New York on that date. C’mon homes, she was acting like she was there, isn’t that good enough?

Rodriguez, must report to L.A. County jail by December 24, 2007. Merry F’in Xmas ABC!

Michelle Rodriguez, DUI, Kiefer Sutherland, Lost, 24, ABC, FOX

We here at the Trash Talkin’ Rodeo love us some Margaret Cho. We learned some of our best trash talkin’ tricks from her. And you’ve got to love anyone with the stones to get up and do something like this:

Margaret Cho has bigger balls than some rugby players I know (and not just the female rugby players.)

Margaret Cho, pasties

We were all simply shocked when it was revealed in Growing Up Brady that Greg Brady (Barry Williams) and Mrs Brady (Florence Henderson) had once gone on a date. How weird! And apparently there were hook ups left and right: Greg with Marcia, Peter with Jan, and even Bobby and Cindy got “married” one day on the set.

But it seems that Marcia still has to be the center of attention, as she is dropping this bombshell in her own tell-all book, Here’s the Story: Lesbitarianism!!!!

Wholesome former THE BRADY BUNCH star MAUREEN MCCORMICK is set to reveal the beloved 70s TV series’ most shocking secret in a new book - she and her on-screen sister had a lesbian fling. MCCormick’s tell-all, Here’s The Story, won’t hit bookstores until 2008, but publishers are already buzzing about the big reveal. As well as talking candidly about her well-documented eating disorder and drug problems in the book, TV’s Marcia Brady will come clean about a romance she had with co-star Eve Plumb, who played her sister Jan on the hit show. A source tells America’s National Enquirer, “The most explosive comments will be how the then-blonde, blue-eyed cutie developed a crush on Eve Plumb, which led to some sexual play. “This book will certainly come as a shocker. While Maureen is not a lesbian, she reveals there were some sexual hijinks going on behind the scenes. “It’s bizarre because she played such a virginal character on the show.”

What’s next? Will we find out that Ann B. Davis really was boning the butcher? But hey, I guess we finally know the origin of the famous phrase “Marcia! Marcia! Marcia!!“

The first 20 minutes of this live blog were preempted so that Lori and Amy could eat tacos (email us for the recipe) but here’s a brief recap of what you missed: Ryan Seacrest looks shiny, stupid, gay, not funny, gay, gay, gay, Nobody Misses Raymond, stupid, funny, gay, Jeremy Piven looks coked up, not funny, Vanessa Williams has nice boobs.

All right, now we are all caught up.

Lori: Ryan Seacrest just called Paula a druggie!

Amy: Oh, burn! And now he has to kiss her drunk ass.

Lori & Amy: TINA FEY! TINA FEY! TINA FEY! Cleavage!

Amy: Pam! The Office! She’s from St. Louis! Where we live!

Lori: We’re still waiting to see her at Target.

Amy: Suck it, My Name is Earl person.

Lori: Honey, you are trying too hard.

Amy: MEH! Fine I won’t talk then! Ha! Heigl! You pronounced her name wrong, suck it announcer lady, I ain’t the only one who’s lame!

Lori: Ed Asner is still alive? Does anyone watch mini-series anymore? Mini-serieses? Mini-serii?

Amy: Look, a category full of nothing we’ve watched.

Lori: It’s the night of thanking Dads. We can’t make fun of that. We loves us our dads!

Amy: I think my Dad was nominated for Best Use of a Beard (long term)

Lori: My Dad was nominated for Best Arms in a polo shirt… of course my mom was the only one voting.

Amy: Why is Ellen wearing a Bible bookmark around her neck?

Lori: To look for feminine or something. Honoring Tom Snyder. That is really nice, but it’s not giving us much to work with here. Fast forward ….

Amy: …. To lame jokes from the cast of Entourage. Edgy!

Lori: Why are there so many nominees in each category? I think my aunt was nominated for Best Supporting Actress in a Drama series.

Amy: Go Aunt Jean!

Lori: I don’t watch Gray’s Anatomy, but I’m fairly certain it’s shitty. I hate it when they thank people just by their first names.

Amy: And Katherine Heigl throws it back to the Moms!

Lori: Dads all over the country are throwing potato chips at the TV.

Amy: Oooh! Writers! Our dream job!

Lori: We can’t make fun of these because they are too damn funny. We bow to the superior wit!

Amy: Illegal immigrants are funny! There should be an Emmy for best writer intros. Those were the funniest thing so far.

Lori: And undoubtably the funniest part of the whole show.

Amy: Conan O’Brien looks like Beavis.

Lori: Musical number! Tony Bennett and a knocked-up Christina Aguliera! Fast forward!

Amy: Snore. Tell me when the Tony Bennett ass-kiss is over.

Lori: Hello! This is not the Grammys!

Amy: Another mini-series category. More stuff we didn’t watch!

Lori: Fast forward! You know this show would be a lot better if it was on MTV.

Amy: Okay, we are one hour in. How are you feeling?

Lori: BORED. Oh, there’s Queen Latifah. I guess they had to bring in a black person from the music world to talk about a TV show about black people, since there are no black people on TV now. Was Chris Rock already booked?

Amy: I’m not cultured. I was looking at her boobs.

Lori: Doogie Howser, I’m gay M.D.!

Amy: Oh and Hayden Panettiere. Save the empire waistline, save the world.

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If Clay Aiken is bringing the Sexy back, then bring on the granny panties because I sure as hell don’t want it anymore. In fact, he doesn’t need to bring it back; he can keep it and I’ll give him a full refund anyway! Cash, not store credit!

On the plus side, I’d love to see Madonna kick the crap out of him after seeing him do this:

Oh no, he’s not gay.

Clay Aiken, Sexyback, Vogue, Like a Virgina, Madonna, Justin Timberlake

Hmm, so maybe Adam Sandler WAS the perfect guy for a movie like I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry. Apparently, back in the day, Sandler and director Judd Apatow (Knocked Up, The 40 Year Old Virgin, Freaks and Geeks) shared an apartment. Sandler, it seems look a little extra interest in his roommate’s personality.

Director Judd Apatow was shocked when he shared an apartment with his friend Adam Sandler because the superstar comic was desperate to see his manhood.

The filmmaker, 39, and Sandler, 40, lived together in their early 20s, and Apatow refused to show his roommate his penis. But Sandler was persistent.

Apatow says, “When we first moved in together, very early on he said, ‘Let me see your penis.’ I was like, ‘No! What do you want to see that for?’ He’s like, ‘I just want to know what I’m dealing with.’ He wasn’t embarrassed about it… He would tell other people ‘Judd won’t show me it, he won’t show me it.’

“One day I’m going to the bathroom, standing up and I just see Adam over my shoulder. All he says to me is, ‘All right, man. All right.’ I guess it was all right.”

No word on if Apatow got find out just how Jewish Sandler is.

Adam Sandler, Judd Apatow, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, Knocked Up, 40 Year Old Virgin, Freaks and Geeks, penis, junk, circumcision