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There ain’t no second chance against the thing with 40 eyes

Wednesday, March 4th, 2009

So I was checking out CNN.com earlier today and there was a headline that caught my eye. (Isn’t that what headlines are supposed to do? Catch your eye? Well this one worked.) All it said was: Michael Jackson to make an announcement. Well, now THAT is specific.

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I clicked on the link because I had to know how there was a story behind this. How could it be more than just a headline, just a sentence, just a sentence fragment, even? Are there paragraphs involved? Was a fact-checker involved? Did it have to be rewritten more than once?

Turns out that news about upcoming news is actually news, involving eight paragraphs, albeit, many repeating rumors that Jackson was going to announce concert dates, his first since the big ugly child molestation charge. No surprise, since his financial troubles are well-documented and everyone knows he almost lost Neverland Ranch. (And when was the last time he was even at Neverland Ranch?)

Would you see Michael Jackson in concert if you had a chance? Yeah, I probably would, just to see if he’s still got it despite all the controversy and his increasing crazypantsness. And with the hope that he would focus on the awesome songs from Thriller and Bad maybe some old songs from the Jackson 5 days, and did not perform “Man in the Mirror,” because, shut up, Michael Jackson. But the chance to hear “Billie Jean,” “Pretty Young Thing,” “Smooth Criminal,” and “Dirty Diana,” well hell yeah, I’d go and buy the t-shirt too!

Big Box of Gay Marriage

Friday, May 16th, 2008

Yesterday The California Supreme Court took a stance for equality and what’s right by overturning the archaic ban on gay marriage. Yes we called it archaic, we’re talking to you Missouri! The judges reaffirmed their belief that all residents of this state should be treated the same under the law. Go figure!

Now here’s some famous folks talking to The Advocate about this historic day

Ellen DeGeneres:
“I’m thrilled that the California supreme court overturned the ban on gay marriage. I can’t wait to get married. We all deserve the same rights, and I believe that someday we’ll look back on this and not allowing gays to marry will seem as absurd as not allowing women to vote.

P.S. I’m registered at Crate & Barrel.”

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T.R. Knight:
Our ‘certain inalienable rights’ are protected today. It makes me proud to live in a country that works to correct its sins.”

Melissa Etheridge:
“I feel they have made an honest woman of me. What a wonderful blessing for us and the gay community. We’re moving forward. It makes me feel happy for the whole human race that we are finally getting out of our differences and coming together and we are putting this all behind us. It really is going to be the thing that we talk to our kids and our grandkids and say, ‘That was the olden days — wasn’t that ridiculous?’”

Marc Jacobs:

” Who to love and how to love should be up to the individual or the couple. Enough said!”

And what would gay stuff be without music? Just for good measure, here’s Commitment Ceremony by Julie Goldman and Kate McKinnon. (warning, this will get stuck in your head).

Please, for the love of God, don’t ask the Olsen twins to be godparents

Monday, April 14th, 2008

Aw, talk about a full house! Well, that would be my joke if Jodie Sweetin, former star of that awful show that absolutely everyone I know watched faithfully, Full House, had had triplets or something. But I can’t let any mention of her go by without bringing up the show and the role that will follow her forever — Stephanie Tanner! How rude!

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Jodie and her husband, Cody Herpin (sounds like heprin which just thins your blood and does not knock up former child stars) welcomed a baby girl on Saturday afternoon via C-section. Little Zoie (what’s with the extra letter there?) weighed 8 pounds 7 ounces and was 21 inches long.

I do like to poke some fun at ole Stephanie Tanner, but we here at Trashy Celebs do wish her and her new family all the best. Mazel Tov! Just please don’t show the little one old tapes from when you hosted Pants Off Dance Off.

Stop AIDS. Keep the Promise.

Saturday, December 1st, 2007

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World AIDS Day 2007.

Kate Winslet Saturday: Funny Mom Edition

Saturday, September 22nd, 2007

The Trash Talkers’ hero, Tina Fey, with her daughter, Alice.

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And be sure to watch for our new site, Watching 30 Rock, (subtitled: We Love Tina Fey and Won’t Shut Up About It) debuting Monday, September 24.

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Street-cred shoot to hell by flashing gang sign with Paris Hilton

Sunday, September 9th, 2007

50 Cent lost major homeboy points this weekend while hanging out with Paris Hilton in Las Vegas for the MTV Video Music Awards. Look for more coverage tomorrow morning as we not-so-live blog the VMA’s.
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If I had $300 dollars I would buy________.

Tuesday, August 7th, 2007

What would you buy with $300? Or even $200 or $100? Now is your chance to find out! Comment on any 451 Press site during the month of August and you could win! Three comments will be chosen at random to win a cash prize of $300, $200 or $100. The more you comment the more chances you have to win. So start reading and let those fingers fly.

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Plinco Rocks

Tuesday, July 24th, 2007

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Drew Carey announced yesterday that he will indeed be the new host of the Price is Right during a taping of The Late Show with David Letterman. “I realize what a big responsibility this is,” Carey said. “It’s only a game show, but it’s the longest-running game show in American television and I plan to keep it that way.” However what Carey failed to mention was that the scantily clad “Barker’s Beauties” will now dress as Mimi.
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This date in today

Wednesday, July 11th, 2007

This date in today July 11, 2007 - Dane Cook still not funny.

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Is she or isn’t she?

Tuesday, June 19th, 2007

Does anyone remember Coral from MTV’s Real World? Yeah, me either.coral.jpg

Actually, that is not completely true. I had to look up which season she was on, but I do remember her as one of the more interesting cast members from before the show took that horrible turn and just became about getting drunk and having sex.

But Coral (pictured at the left above with best friend, Melissa Howard from The Real World: New Orleans) may have become a little more interesting, as she seems to be slowly creeping her way out of the closet.

What is your sexual orientation? You dated men on Real World.
Oh, yeah. It’s very cloudy at this point in time. I’m definitely venturing toward my lesbian qualities. It’s been a long time coming. At that time, I was really unsure. That was not the proper venue, the proper platform. To come out to your parents on a fucking reality show, I think that’s just mean, so I didn’t.

Your girlfriend is very beautiful.
She’s not my girlfriend. I’m attracted to beautiful women. Beautiful women tend to be attracted to me. It really seems to work out for me.

I have to say, I did watch part of her season (Real World: Return to New York) but I never suspected. Mazel Tov, Coral!

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